BLOG: The dirge by Tonto Dike

BLOG: The dirge by Tonto Dike


With heavy heart I wish to remind the general public of the passing of our friend and work colleague:

AUTOTUNE
He had been responsible for the successful careers of T-pain and Akon amongst many other artistes. In 2009 he was thought to have been killed by Jay-z but had secretly been hiding in Nigeria. He had been spotted in the EME studios in the company of Wizkid not to mention MI Abaga and Naeto C. It is rumoured that he is the reason that Akon had been visiting Nigeria so often
:D

He was alive and well up until last week when he came in touch with the Nollywood “actress” Tonto Dike. She decided to delve into music and worked with him. In his career he has been able to talentless singers the semblance of a voice. But Ms. Dike defied all his abilities and promptly put him to death.

We would like to sympathize with his family and friends and hope that God will help them through their loss…

RIP AUTOTUNE
I’m sure Tonto was inspired by her fellow Nolly people such as Omotola and Genevive who in turn were probably inspired by their hollywood counter parts. Let me mention a few.

Jennifer Lopez
“Jenny from the block” was primarily known as an actress until 1999 when she released her debut album On the 6 which had hits like If you had my love and Waiting for tonight.

To date she has sold over 70 million records and still calls over $10 million per movie role. If only she could be this successful in her choice of men…

On to the next one!
Bruce Willis
No I didn’t make a mistake, the tough as nails Die hard star launched an album in 1987 titled The
Return of Bruno. His music was greeted with very moderate success after which he returned to movies.

Eddie Murphy
In 1985 the comedian released his first musical album titled How could it be and had one noticeable track Party all the time.The rest of the album can be described in one word:
bleh!

Time will prevent me from mentioning the other like Jackie Chan, Nick Cannon, Lindsay Lohan and the plethora of failed transitions to pop music stardom.

Actually there was a time in hollywood when you couldn’t get a gig unless you could act and sing. How the times have changed.

So till Nigerian Politicians decide to release music albums I remain yours truly.
Laji D’wayem.

P.S. – What do you think should be the penalty for Nigerian songs that are rubbish?

http://lajidwayem.wordpress.com/

Click here to subscribe to The Paradigm Newsletter

Comments

comments

Share your thoughts


With heavy heart I wish to remind the general public of the passing of our friend and work colleague:

AUTOTUNE
He had been responsible for the successful careers of T-pain and Akon amongst many other artistes. In 2009 he was thought to have been killed by Jay-z but had secretly been hiding in Nigeria. He had been spotted in the EME studios in the company of Wizkid not to mention MI Abaga and Naeto C. It is rumoured that he is the reason that Akon had been visiting Nigeria so often
:D

He was alive and well up until last week when he came in touch with the Nollywood “actress” Tonto Dike. She decided to delve into music and worked with him. In his career he has been able to talentless singers the semblance of a voice. But Ms. Dike defied all his abilities and promptly put him to death.

We would like to sympathize with his family and friends and hope that God will help them through their loss…

RIP AUTOTUNE
I’m sure Tonto was inspired by her fellow Nolly people such as Omotola and Genevive who in turn were probably inspired by their hollywood counter parts. Let me mention a few.

Jennifer Lopez
“Jenny from the block” was primarily known as an actress until 1999 when she released her debut album On the 6 which had hits like If you had my love and Waiting for tonight.

To date she has sold over 70 million records and still calls over $10 million per movie role. If only she could be this successful in her choice of men…

On to the next one!
Bruce Willis
No I didn’t make a mistake, the tough as nails Die hard star launched an album in 1987 titled The
Return of Bruno. His music was greeted with very moderate success after which he returned to movies.

Eddie Murphy
In 1985 the comedian released his first musical album titled How could it be and had one noticeable track Party all the time.The rest of the album can be described in one word:
bleh!

Time will prevent me from mentioning the other like Jackie Chan, Nick Cannon, Lindsay Lohan and the plethora of failed transitions to pop music stardom.

Actually there was a time in hollywood when you couldn’t get a gig unless you could act and sing. How the times have changed.

So till Nigerian Politicians decide to release music albums I remain yours truly.
Laji D’wayem.

P.S. – What do you think should be the penalty for Nigerian songs that are rubbish?

http://lajidwayem.wordpress.com/

Click here to subscribe to The Paradigm Newsletter

Comments

comments

Share your thoughts

%d bloggers like this: